I want to start with a disclaimer. I'm not usually the blogging type in this particular subject, I feel its a bit cliche and cheesy, but here I am. Why you may ask, I want to be a voice for change and an active voice in that. My purpose is not to offend, but to simply state my feelings and thoughts in an open forum in the hopes that I will find I am not alone in my feelings. I do not wish to offend so I'll state it now, if i do I apologize.
I am a mormon (which is not something I openly admit in public). I have been my whole life, I was born into the church in New Zealand and I am the youngest of four siblings a perhaps average but maybe not super large mormon family. Both my parents a converts to the church and are still very active. I have been through primary, young women's and even attended Brigham Young University in Hawaii. I am still a student at university in New Zealand and (what mormons term) a Young Single Adult (YSA). I am almost 24 and I have come to a time in my life where I have questions and doubts.
I keep trying to pin down where all of this began and I would like to say things began with the excommunication of Kate Kelly. I began to wonder how can I be a part of a community a religion per say that treats people like that. I will admit I probably don't know the whole story and maybe I got it wrong maybe I mis-interpreted something, but nevertheless it was a pinging point. It was at this time that the ordained women's movement became much more prominent in my life and I found myself in agreement with them. I strongly believe that there is an inequality in the Latter day saint/Mormon church and it makes me angry and deeply upset that the system, the community I grew up finds it normal perhaps even right to treat women as (i see it) the other to the man. We don't have the priesthood, but in addition to that we have less callings. I mean where does it say anywhere in the world that you have to be a man to handle finances, to handle the organization of meetings and appointments with your bishops, branch presidents or stake presidents. I'm pretty certain that any women could be highly capable of such jobs, perhaps even better, lol.
I am a single women in the church of jesus christ of latter day saints I feel I am discriminated against. Not only because I am a women I am set apart from others but also because I am not married. Within the YSA group we have advisers. These advisers however are usually a married couple who are also chaperones that come to our activities and events, who can in some cases be of help and assistances. But for me I find it undermining that just because someone is married, no matter there age, even if they are younger than me can suddenly have a position, that is above me, that they can suddenly tell me what to do. A couple of years ago in our Dunedin, New Zealand district we had a YSA conference. It was in this event that I was told that in order to be a chaperone you had to be married. My flatmate who isn't married but is over the age of YSA couldn't be a chaperone because she wasn't married. Its like there is this idea that if your married your perhaps better than your single counterparts and its safer for YSA to be around you, your less of a threat. I just want to state now that just because your married doesn't mean anything. I know people who are married I wouldn't trust to be with at all.
I want to end this post by stating more specifically why I am doing this. I am in a community, in all honesty I don't want to be in. It may seem that some of the things I have mentioned are cultural but I also thing it goes deeper than that. I strongly feel that there needs to be a paradigm shift from inequality to equality, we need to stretch our callings beyond the men (might take some weight off their shoulders). As a church we need to take a step outside of our cultural, religious belief systems and see that somethings aren't right. We are meant to be a church of love and acceptance and I certainly don't see that. When christ was on the earth I don't recall him excommunicating anyone or punishing anyone he loved and gave willingly of himself. Some may say i am wrong but if we look to our past, there was a time where blacks weren't allowed the priesthood or to enter the temple. This was changed and amended, the practice of polygamy was stopped. I think its clear that change has happened and thus it can happen again.
I hope this blog will fulfill its goal without controversy and I will be heard, understood and find a common ground with people out there in the mormon world and beyond. I do a lot of yoga, which has become part of and perhaps a new belief system for me. One of my teachers states that in order to resolve or get past something you have to go right through it, you can't go around it because then it will still be there. So here I am going straight through it, straight through my doubts, my questions, my anger and also my hurt.
I am sorry you feel that way and you have been trap in this sphere that the world want you to be in for a long time.
ReplyDeleteThis is not a matter of inequality but a matter of careful consideration and great organization by our Heavenly Father. Look at it this way, our Heavenly Father gave women the power to give birth which men cannot do so He gave the power and authority of the Priesthood to men to lead His church.
Giving birth, nurturing, caring and the greater compassion women has are greater likely to the power and authority of the Priesthood the men as. so i say its a WIN WIN...
So are you saying that if there was a change, you would want to have the priesthood and your husband to be(if there is anyone that would want to marry you) would have the power to give birth to your kids?
i advice you pray to our Heavenly Father but never let the filthy perspectives of the world pull you down to their level but take above to where you should be to our creator who knows you better and knows what is best for you
Hey Alice, much like you I had trouble with the excommunication of Kate Kelly, but one thing that I took comfort in was that she was not excommunicated for her view that women should have the P/hood, but rather the fact that she was beginning to openly encourage others to oppose the teachings of the Church. The Ordain Women movement had been around for years without this happening, but it was once she started organising local and regional protests against the organisation of the Church that it became a problem. We are encouraged to question, it's okay if we have doubts.
ReplyDeleteSimilarly, the Church has released an article recently that it is completely fine for members of the Church as individuals to support gay marriage, as it's done in the spirit of equality and fairness, but it wouldn't be okay to organise a protest against The Family: A Proclamation in the name of gay rights, if you get my drift.
For myself, I have always had issue with the argument against women having the p/hood that "but you get to bear children and give birth". To me that isn't how we should look at things - women are more than just their uterus! There are so many women out there that through no fault of their own are infertile, or have miscarriages and are unable to carry to full term - this does not make them less of a woman. There's no physical barrier that stops men from having the p/hood that can compare to women who can't carry children. We need to look far beyond this argument in order to more fully comprehend Gods plan for us as females.
This is how I have begun to understand it. Bear with me. It's not that women are being denied something here. We don't need to hold the p/hood ourselves in order to reach the Celestial Kingdom, or even to enter the Temple. Men MUST hold the Melchizedek P/hood in order to carry out their endowments in the Temple or be sealed to their eternal companion, let alone enter the Celestial Kingdom.
We don't need it. We can go to the Temple, take out our Endowments, serve a mission, get married, get into the Celestial kingdom, all without holding the p/hood ourselves.
It's not talked about a lot at Church in general, but we know tht we are not just daughters of a Heavenly Father; we are also daughter of a Goddess, our Mother in Heaven, and that is a powerful thing. She is a Goddess and we are made in Her image. We are magical creatures that can create and sometimes destroy life, we have an innate intuition and healing ability, we have a bond to each other that unites us as women that men just don't have and will never understand that goes beyond child bearing and rearing. The P/hood isn't something WE are missing out on, as we are naturally powerful Goddesses in the making. The P/hood is a booby prize, because they lack so much that we have been gifted with, if we could just let go of what we don't have and tap into what is already inside of us.
Now, as for chaperons at YSA activities - if you can find an good way to explain THAT let me know - because now that I'm a SA Rep I have to explain to 75 year old widows why THEY need a chaperon if they want to go to a dance or conference, hahaha!!